Asklemmy

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Is it too late to date for me? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 10 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Hi my fellow Lemmy users! It’s been a while since I used this platform and boy did I actually miss you all ❤️

It’s just that I’ve been more so focusing on myself in my career and in my own education. So I graduated back in June and man it sure does feel like a lifetime ago already. Settled in a good paying job and still trying to improve myself wherever I can.

This brings us to the question that I wanted to ask everyone here. As I’ve been very focused on academics and career stuff I never had the opportunity to date and I’ve been rejected very frequently (which is to be expected as a man tbh). I haven’t been able to lose weight and that I’m 25 years old.

I know that’s still pretty young but I still feel so behind on dating tbh. Is it still too late for me to find someone I want to be with after I’ve lost weight? Does losing weight help for men as it does for women? I’ve been trying to join meetups, volunteering (just to meet new people tbh) and really put myself out there. It’s just idk like all my friends are committed and I’m just floating around life whilst focusing on my career.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

I've started dating a bit late and let me tell you: you can't really be behind. Yeah, there's some generic interpersonal experience you get from dating, but that maxes out at like, 3 months of dating. So I'd put someone who's dated for 3 months and someone who's dated for like 6 years at basically the same point experience wise, if they're both put into a situation where they're back on the dating market after it.

You do build personal rapport with a person during a relationship, but people start and stop those all the time - everyone's on a different schedule, you can't really compare yourself to that.

Oh, and on the weight loss point - don't sweat it!! Being chubby is way less of a dealbreaker when you're a guy. And the people who do mind aren't people you should be giving a chance to anyways 🤷