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It may be that I just don't know which APK to use? My OS installed up-to-date one says I can't use it because it's a split APK and I'm not rooted and that's beyond me. The one I just downloaded was the newest I found on APKMirror but it's failed to apply a bunch of patches and aborted during the process.
Don't use the newest APK, use the version that's recommended by Revanced manager before you patch.
Thanks! I completely glanced past that before and didn't see a version listed on GitHub. Going to try now.
As of now, Revanced manager recommends v 18.23.35.
ApkMirror is arguably the best source to download APKs. It checks that signature matches expected one so you know package is safe and not tampered with. You need to use no DPI version for Revanced, linked correct version above
I would suggest to also go through all patches manually, I remember recommended option had some very strange suggestions at least in the past.
For Google account to work you also need microG. This is a newer version / fork of original microG. inotia00 was one of the original Vanced devs I believe.
Do not download the newest from APKMirror. You should download the most recent version that is supported by the patcher. In youtube's case, it's 18.23.35. Here's the link: https://www.apkmirror.com/apk/google-inc/youtube/youtube-18-23-35-release/youtube-18-23-35-2-android-apk-download/