this post was submitted on 24 Mar 2024
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Stupid evolution. (lemmy.world)
submitted 5 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago (6 children)

The human body is a wonder of completely random chance, but a complete and utter failure of any kind of system. Anyone who isn't a transhumanist is a total jobbernowl, in my humble opinion.

we have organs that only exist to kill us, our mouths are completely fucked, our bodies will just stop making vitally important chemicals, it's stupidly common for our bodies to kill themselves because it freaks out at perfectly benign things, our super special brains take very stupid shortcuts, and of course the bones. A biologist could probably go on for hours about the failures of evolution, but i am not a biologist.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

i'm incredibly salty about how our "only air please" tubes are connected to "everything goes through that" tubes, like what the fuck

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

Don't forget that our spine would prefer having us walk on all fours

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

We should have flaccid teeth that only get hard when we are hungry and see food

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

It would have cost you nothing not to promote the concept of tooth boners.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

brb I need to brush my teeth for the 4th time today

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)

But you see it isn't a failure, in fact it's literally the most successful yet. Evolutionary adaptations don't come about because they make life comfortable they make it so one can live long enough to make babies, everything else is just a bonus

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

Which is why the whole thing kinda starts to break down once a species reaches a point where the specimens can survive after they can no longer produce offspring. Like humans.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

And penises have some magnificent garbage wiring, leading into all sorts of fun stuff you wouldn't wish on your enemy. Evolution is just a giant brute force mechanism. An LLM of biology, if you will.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Being a transhumanist is foolish. Just skip the middleman and make better robots to completely take over our species.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

What's wrong with our mouths?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

@kraftpudding @shani66 teeth and gum problems, the ability to get brain freeze or literal saliva stones

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

Our teeth don't fit correctly either, nor are they really suited enough to the environment to last as long as we live.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I don't remember the show (or even if it was a show) but a guy went to the doctor to complain about his back pain. Doctor said that it might clear up in several thousand years. Confused, the patient asks for clarification. Basically, humans went bipedal too soon, and our spines weren't made to be upright for so long at a time. The doctor's analogy was that we "turned a clothesline into a flagpole".

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Louie, whatever anyone feels about its creator it's still a great show.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I had bad carpal tunnel. I still do, but it was worse.

They do a test where they use some crazy BDSM shit and shock your arms to measure the response in your nerves (which indicates compression) and then they do a needle thing to measure the movement of your muscles.

The sick fucks said that second one would be "unpleasant" but it was like my hand was on fire the whole time.

If your fingers get tingly, get wrist splints for sleeping. That's it

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago

I got my hand issues checked out way too late. Turns out I had REALLY bad carpal tunnel. My only treatment option at that point was surgery. I could hardly use my hands for 5 months before the surgery. Both hands got the ligament in the palms snipped and now everything is pretty good.

If your hands hurt and/or feel weird and/or don't work right, see a fuckin doctor. Don't wait like my dumb ass did lmao.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

I didn't find nerve conduction studies too bad but by that time I'd spent 18 months feeling like I was holding my arms over a fire so a different unpleasant sensation was basically like a cool towel on sunburn :p

Also I'm a like please-skin-me-a-little masochist, so maybe it is bdsm shit :p

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago (3 children)

It's the reason we have so many birth complications. Why do you think we are the only animal on the planet that is bipedal all the time? It's actually really mind bending how we survived and thrived

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Technically...birds are bipedal all the time. They went about it very differently though.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Birds have optimized for minimum weight tho, so they can afford to only have 2 limbs supporting the entire body

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

haha got me there should have said mammals

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

We are just too stubborn to die out.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Figured out the one trick Nature didn't want you know - evolution can be circumvented by sheer ignorant willpower.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Not only we're the only bipedal mammal, we have the biggest head relative to our body out of any animal. That combination is just not a good time for anyone involved

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

That's why I treat mine like the garbage it is.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

No shit. Humans started walking on two legs, suddenly giving birth is fucking atrocious. That was natural selection at work and we should have taken the hint.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

It's not really skeletal it's muscular.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Don't get me started on knees

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Wrists are also surprisingly weak.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

And arms are heavy

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

There's vomit on his sweater already

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

My dad had to get one replaced. That was a sucky year for him.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Anyone with sciatica could have told you this

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Where's our adaptive evolution?!?!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

That's... why we're here