this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2024
646 points (98.8% liked)

Programmer Humor

19154 readers
2012 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 245 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 55 points 3 months ago

This is the true story of my life. I'm still working towards that last cell.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 months ago

I'm speedrunning this shit.

[–] [email protected] 210 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Reminds of that post a month ago...

[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Wait is he still on the Azure Performance team?

[–] [email protected] 37 points 3 months ago

Azure needs him to care for Microsoft's Golden Goose at his farm.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Nope. If he hadn't quit, it would say "present" instead of July 2024

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Look under "Principal Software Development Engineer." It says "2017-present"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

That's the basis for my claim actually. The other position has a date not the word "present". Which I now realize includes 2023 not this year, so I don't know what the original question was getting at.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

But...it says "august 2017-present" on the screenshot I'm looking at? Right? Also, isn't July 2024 like, next month?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

It says 2023, not 24. Commenter typo’d. and the top number is correct. Bottom one is probably custom filled out, not based on actual work history.

[–] [email protected] 83 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Man is actually living the dream, the crazy son of a bitch did it.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

He has become a battery for AI

[–] [email protected] 78 points 3 months ago (5 children)

Farming? Really? Man of your talents?

[–] [email protected] 52 points 3 months ago

It's a peaceful life.

[–] [email protected] 51 points 3 months ago

You don't need to be skilled in something to get enjoyment out of it

Likewise you don't necessarily get enjoyment out of something just because you're skilled in it.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

My entire career is based on "yeah but you're good with computers and programming!" I just wanted to do fine arts and paint for fuck sake. And I could have made a career out of it, as history as since shown! Ah well. Maybe my kids will fare better, we'll see.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

It's never too late, especially if you can combine the two!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

Dirt cleans off a lot easier than blood.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Seriously, some people are that good that you know they could do almost anything very well in a matter of days.

So why not ? I always have a lot of respect for someone that is willing to drastically change their lives in order to improve.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

It's a quote from a Star Wars ~~show~~ movie.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Ah gee dang, you're right. Thanks!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

Its a quote from Rogue One if I'm not mistaken

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

Huh, my first thought was that they went to the farm upstate where everyone's pets end up.

[–] [email protected] 70 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
[–] [email protected] 40 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Surprised it wasn't woodworking

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 months ago

"I no longer build software; I now make furniture out of wood"

Legendary

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

nah, brings back memories from the Pragmatic Programmer cover

[–] [email protected] 37 points 3 months ago (1 children)

As I get older, farming seems more enjoyable than dealing with technology. Sometimes it's nice to just slow down.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The kind of farming that makes any money isn't slow work.

It is, however, tangible work with tangible results. Unlike spending months changing the polarity of nanoscopic silicon structure for the non-appreciation of an utterly clueless salesperson whose braindead ideas will have left the world in a worse state than you found it despite anyone's best efforts.

I should seriously get into woodworking. Kidding. Sorta.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

remember when you would type a few lines of code and then a widget would appear immediately and you'd feel a tiny spark of emotion?

[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 months ago (1 children)

One of my colleague is leader of the team managing our internal software systems, but also a potato farmer. Somehow.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I have some chickens and some cows. It's easy to combine small scale with wfh. Just need to move soemwhere with land and wifi.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Work from home? Work from chicken coup!

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Farming is god-awful if your livelihood depends on it. I'd rather be a carpenter or a metalworker once I'm fed up with that computer stuff.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Wielders are paid close to programmers in my country

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago

I feel this in my soul. If I were independently wealthy or had a sizeable amount of passive income, I probably would give up the corporate life and just do something like farming.

But in reality, most of the farmers in my area either have to make do with very little or they end up having to work a full time job to supplement the farm income, build a retirement fund, and to have decent health insurance. Kind of takes the joy out of it if I know I'm either going to have to compromise further on healthcare & retirement, or if I'm going to have to continue working another job either way.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

Was woodworking another common one?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

I wondered why I was getting notification from that repo after pretty long time. At least 3 people commented after this post

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

I could be a farmer...

An MMO gold farmer. 😌

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

ooh, has anyone made something that transfers ownership of unmaintained codebases via bug bounty? like a sword-in-the-stone for critical fixes?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

Just fork it

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Don’t be fooled he’s going out there to hsck tractors now.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Spend years automating small farm tasks that take minutes

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Automation at full speed

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›