Have you considered taking medication like Adderall?
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I am not even diagnosed at the moment. And the whole process of getting diagnosed in my country is discouraging me. And somehow I fear that I would lose an portion of "me" if I would medicate now.
I grew up without a diagnose and some how habdlrd it and coped with it enough that it wasn't directly a problem. Until last year when I get to know somebody who is diagnosed who said to me I probably have it and I am still learning what it realy means, but it helps knowing now the words to describe how I always fellt.
Sorry I got lost, so maybe someday but unsure.
Being a responsible adult with ADHD means kind of doing both in a controlled way. What I mean by that is, ADHD gives you some deficits and difficulties. On the one hand, you can't use it as an excuse to not work on those difficulties and do your best. On the other hand, you also shouldn't be hard on yourself if your best sometimes doesn't measure up to other people's expectations. And for your sanity you should always give yourself breaks from working on yourself.